1. |
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remember that one time you thought you were in love
when it comes down, when push comes to shove
you'd just convinced yourself you were in love
think of another time you thought it was true
it didn’t go away then, it still feels new
when you see her face or feel her touch
its easy to feel like you are in love
but maybe in love's not the way that you feel
perhaps you just think it cause the crush is too real
but she's just your best friend and you'll never know why
you have to feel so hurt on the inside
remember that time we hung all summer long
waterparks, Levi, gazing at stars
you sang every word, like it was you
I wanted to feel it too
You’re still the only one that I've ever seen
I'm glad that I told you but back then I felt weak
How many times was it, two or sixteen?
Hoping for it back, like this was a dream
“I love someone but no one can know”
It killed me that day, God I felt so low
You didn’t know then and now you think that you do
I hope someday I will, but then I hope I never do
Cause love always ends no matter the kind
People leave in different ways- abandon or die
Even if you're in the same place, you’ll never stop trying
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2. |
radio booth blues
02:07
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Sunny days and warm breezes
Pretty flowers and rainy evenings
Blooming caterpillars and warty toads
Fall sweaters and leaf filled roads
Pesky mosquitoes and red red wasps
Summer days, car always washed
Windows down with music blaring
3 packs a day and never caring
smoke and drink and always swearing-
best way I know to help with faring.
Guitar, drums, bass, and voice
Everyday you make the choice
“live life to the fullest” but I cant
although I wish, my lungs aren’t meant
to breathe the songs I wish they did
they’ll live forever inside my head
even in summer when weather’s fair
when I lay in fields and steadily stare
songs always come but never escape
one day they’ll get out but itll be too late
nothing is good enough, or so it seems
kills me to know ill never have my dreams
to write music for me, just for myself
I try my best but feel I need help
If its really for me, I’m not good enough for myself.
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3. |
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What makes your hand shake in the mornings? Those lips like I’ve never seen
Always pursing at some thing I can’t seem to see
You’re hard to read
Eyes always glowing differently, piercing me
Try to see right through you but you’re out of reach
It’s not something I mind, sometimes it feels good to me
Privacy is crucial at least that’s what Jen told me
And I agree
Watch as your cig burns away, so contemplatively
You worry me
Even when there is no need, I’ll find something
Just being me
What makes your hand shake in the mornings? What gets your skin all bright and glowing?
It feels like history
Document it in moments while we sip our tea
Quietly
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4. |
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some days i wake up
with a pain
gnawing at
my veins
begging to be spilled out
i could let it all stream
with just a small split
i dont know what
keeps me from it
at this point
how do i keep
going when
i feel so weak
guess it doesnt matter
it just happens somehow
one day you look up
its been five years now
things will keep going
as long as you stay
even if while youre here
you wish everything away
im not sure if theres
any point but to live
to exist and breathe
and make some family
i dont have much but i
choose my own
only a few but
they feel like home
new places come in
and some go
no matter who's around
ill always know
that i have me
although it doesnt feel
like its always enough
i have my legs and my feet
i dont know if
theres a reason
or if its death
slowly easing
either way im stuck here i guess
its all i know ill take that its best
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5. |
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the night we drove to jackson
was a night i coulda disappeared
the night we drove to jackson
i shoulda drank 16 more beers
all i could do was sit and think
and ponder how bad i felt
i looked up and tried not to blink
i knew my eyes might tell
it never works out like i think
i try to make it work
i have a smoke and a drink
it just makes me feel worse
the night we drove to jackson
i felt outside of my body
the night we drove to jackson
i should have felt holy
what an honor to be there
on time that wasn't mine
it felt good but almost not fair
like i was somehow wasting life
there were old people around
i should have felt comfortable
i could only stare at the ground
and try not to look disturbed
the night we drove to jackson
i was the only one who didnt swim
i watched everyone laughing
but didnt want to get in
i shouldn't be feeling this way
it just seemed like it wasnt right
i had known it the whole day
i tried hard but i couldnt fight
she told me i was being mean
i wasnt, i just felt bad
i didnt feel like being seen
she didnt get it, i guess no one can
the night we drove to jackson
Heaven dancing to The Cure
i was never part of the action
i dont know, i wasnt sure
we separated into groups
i didn't feel like being alone
i wanted to tell the truth
everyone was too far gone
i didnt think of calling you
i dont remember why
maybe it would have helped the blue
it was too late to try
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6. |
september
03:20
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when I sit down to write a song
its not something that comes naturally
I have to force it out of my system
I don’t just hear it leisurely
But when im high I hear music
When im sober its just from other bands
When im really in it I hear everything
Percussion, strings, the brass
Its something that hurts to think about
That I don tjust have it in me
I guess you have to work for everything
That realization is just new to me
I don’t really know how to write a song
Its all just bullshit really
My songs don’t really have structure
No chorus verse melody
I guess they do in some way
But its more just like someone speaking
No real solid set up
I write them in minutes, quickly
I don’t even know how to play guitar
Don’t even know anything really
I just write something out and hope for the best
Its not getting me anywhere seriously
I guess the songs are just for me
At least that’s what I tell myself
If that’s so then why do I post them all for someone else
When I sit down to write a song
I feel cool calm and collected
But after I feel its done and written
It somehow always feels neglected
It takes years to write an album
With how many songs I have how long does it take me?
An hour or a week,
It’s a testament to my shitty ability
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7. |
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You got me wrapped round your little finger
Feels so good I have to stay and linger
Yeah you got me wrapped round your little finger
I know we can beat this weather
Until then I’ll let you wear my sweater
Yeah you got me wrapped round your little finger
Feels so right whenever we’re together
In fact I’m sure I’ve never felt better
Yeah you got me wrapped round your little finger
babe ‘fore you don’t think I’ve ever known pleasure
Yeah you got me wrapped round your little finger
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8. |
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Mail doesn’t run on sundays
In love all over the house
Thought it could only end one way
Ended is how it turns out
Thought i knew myself
Better than this
That you loved me more
Than I knew
Thought we would go far
Into the future
Always told myself
What wasnt true
Mail doesn’t run on sundays
I’m all alone in my house
Watch the sun come up most days
Missing you without a doubt
Don’t know why
It took
So long to hit me
Don’t like this
Feeling of being blue
Thought I would feel good
After the fact
But I feel bad
With or without you
Mail doesn’t run on sundays
Mail doesn’t run on sundays
Mail doesn’t run on sundays
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9. |
change
03:07
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Sat at our spot or maybe it’s mine
Come on now, think bout the times
We sat right here, wasting away
The very last sun of the day
I’m told you see someone and I don’t like it
I’m told to forget but I can’t fight it
I’m told you see someone but I don’t believe it
I’m told you don’t miss me but I don’t feel it
Truth of it all is that it doesn’t matter
If we’d never been, would we both be gladder?
I try to move on and all I get is sadder
Unable to eat and all I get is fatter
I’m sat at our spot in Cherokee
A mile from where you said you loved me
Sometimes it gets too much, can’t be in this town
Not here with you everywhere around
It’s not just you physically it’s the memories that flash constantly
It’s to the point where it doesn’t feel real
When will it begin to heal
Tired of this hurt that I carry around
Tired of reasons to put myself down
Tired of hurting the people to which I’m close
When it comes to anything I’m the biggest joke
You loved me then, it’s not the same
I don’t like how things change
I don’t like how things change
I don’t like how things chang
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